Nostra-Dan-us’ Way Too Early 2020 NBA Playoff Predictions

Yeah, I broke my crystal ball, but it never really worked in the first place

If you’ve been following my writing, you’d know that last year I incorrectly predicted the Golden State Warriors to three-peat as NBA champions. Not just once, but twice; Therefore, I really have no business trying to do this a second time.

But, I did correctly nail the Eastern Conference semi-final matchups, and I even predicted that the Raptors would beat the 76ers in seven games.

Plus, writing this piece is just too much damn fun.

So, call me now, readers, as I, Nostra-Dan-us, gaze into this murky crystal ball of mine. This now cracked, and spotted crystal ball, that no matter how many times I wash it in my kitchen sink, it just will not get clear! Maybe if I did the dishes first?

Follow me and my predictions, all the way into the NBA playoffs!

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The Warriors’ Boogeyman II: Return of ‘The Claw’

Most experts are saying the reigning/repeat NBA champions don’t have much to fear in their eastern conference opponent, the Toronto Raptors. Perhaps that’s only because they’re not standing in their shoes?

A good boogeyman is one that is motivated. Probably the greatest example of this is Jason Voorhees of Friday the 13th fame.

Poor Jason was the victim of negligent camp counselors who were all too busy doing drugs and having sex to notice that one of their campers was drowning in Crystal Lake. When no one was held accountable, his mother decided to dish out a little justice of her own, killing the negligent counselors, before meeting the same fate as her son. Then, through some miracle (Hollywood), Jason was resurrected, grew to about the size of J.J. Watt, and began seeking some payback on those responsible for the murder of his mother (why TV doesn’t play a marathon of these movies during Mother’s Day is anyone’s guess).

Sometimes a boogeyman is already a killer, but is suddenly given a motive that drives them. Such is the case with Freddy Krueger from A Nightmare on Elm Street.

Freddy was arrested for killing and torturing children. When he was brought to justice, he got off on a technicality (don’t you just love lawyers?), and was set free. This didn’t sit well with the victims’ parents, obviously, who promptly burned Freddy to death in a boiler room on Elm Street; However, just because Freddy was killed, doesn’t mean he was banished for good (it doesn’t?). Through some miracle (guess who again?), Freddy is able to kill and torture the children of Elm Street where their parents can’t protect them: In their dreams.

All of this brings us to our boogeyman of the hour: Kawhi Leonard.

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Nostra-Dan-us is a Hack!

I thought it would be fun for all of us to go back and laugh at all of the 2019 playoff “predictions” I made back in October.

Back in October, I, Nostra-Dan-us, made some wild and silly predictions for the upcoming 2019 NBA playoffs, that start tomorrow. I’ve taken off my ridiculous white afro and Jamaican accent, to go back over each and every single one, with my correction pen, and edit as I see fit.

Let’s see how I did, shall we?

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Nostra-Dan-us’ Way Too Early NBA Playoff Predictions

… or “How the Golden State Warriors Will Win the 2019 NBA Finals”

If you spend your free time like I do this time of year, skimming through the internet searching for NBA news, you’ve probably run across a few “regular season predictions”. You may have even seen a few posts on Twitter with someone’s “end of season award predictions”.

Let’s not kid ourselves. The NBA is insanely easy to predict. It’s even easier when you understand which story-lines the league wishes to see, and what is within the realm of possibility for them to orchestrate.

The Golden State Warriors will be your 2019 NBA Champions. Kevin Durant will join Michael Jordan and Shaquille O’Neal as a Three-Peat NBA Finals MVP. Everyone knows that. But how will we arrive at that conclusion? More importantly, when the outcome is already predetermined, does anyone even care anymore? (I hope so, I have a lot of writing to do).

Follow me, reader, as I, Nostra-Dan-us, gaze deep into my crystal ball. Deep, past the end of the regular season and all of those other prediction posts you have read. All the way to the NBA Finals!

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